trying to get a hold on this

starting to geeeek out 

First Weekend


my friends get drunk, ask questions
no, you’re not gay just because it messes you up when gorgeous girls sustain eye contact
that happens with everybody

my back slopes the sweat onto your sheets
makeup sex/breakup sex
who could know at this point

sarah says she’s not looking for anybody, no one excites her
you’re in love until you’re not anymore & it’s troubling how unpoetic it ends
i dont know who, someone way smarter than me said
poems are never finished, only abandoned

professional emails & adult meals, boring predictable bedtimes 
will always be years away for us

lost my debit card in a grass parking lot 
the field flotsam all over, cigarette butts but no one ever visibly smoking
i smell it distantly & chase strangers for free beers & dont know
what the score of the game is
i know it’s poor school spirit but is anyone else tired of standing on the bleachers
i’ll sit down if you sit down
does anyone know the score

now that i think of it it was paul valery who said that, he was in love
with edgar allan poe like i am in love with skateboarding at night,
insane & addictive & somebody’s gonna get hurt

will really fucked up his foot
love is a poem never finished, only abandoned
longboarders bombing down the strip of pavement cutting through the cemetery
rumble grave beneath, no homework forever

red white & blue tanktop boys on the lawn, crop top girls in the house
dont put your drink down or they’ll all kill you at once, i heard
like zombies

wakeup sex & makeup sex & breakup sex
addictive, lovely cycle 
i’m scared you’ll never not excite me 

it’s september? haha holy fuck i’m gonna become a california resident this week :x :) :D :O :/ :,) :~!@#$%^&

I’ve spent my 18 years of life trying to be okay with the fact that humans fade in and out of each others’ lives. No matter how I think about it, I can’t make it sound romantic or poetic. To those who have already passed through my life and to those who eventually will: I love you. I miss you. The back door will always be unlocked if you ever feel like coming home.

(Source: dearalexandra, via neutralclashofcolor)

mindy kaling’s instagram pic that includes fucking nasim pedrad and jenny slate like wow ok can i be at that pool party puhleeease